Friday, March 23, 2012
150 carat diamond ring
http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/world-first-diamond-150-carat-ring-created-swiss-141731588.html
Monday, March 12, 2012
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Friday, March 9, 2012
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
classmate or how time flies
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN GUILTY OF LOOKING AT OTHERS YOUR OWN AGE AND
THINKING,
SURELY I CAN'T LOOK THAT OLD..... well, .
MY NAME IS ALICE , AND I WAS SITTING IN THE WAITING ROOM FOR MY
FIRST
APPOINTMENT WITH A NEW DENTIST.
I NOTICED HIS DIPLOMA ON THE WALL, WHICH BORE HIS FULL NAME.
SUDDENLY:
I REMEMBERED A TALL, HANDSOME, DARK-HAIRED BOY WITH THE SAME NAME
HAD
BEEN IN MY HIGH SCHOOL CLASS SOME 50-ODD YEARS AGO.
COULD HE BE THE SAME GUY THAT I HAD A SECRET CRUSH ON, WAY BACK
THEN?
UPON SEEING HIM, HOWEVER, I QUICKLY DISCARDED ANY SUCH THOUGHT..
THIS BALDING, GRAY-HAIRED MAN WITH THE DEEPLY LINED FACE WAS WAY TOO
OLD TO HAVE BEEN MY CLASSMATE.
AFTER HE EXAMINED MY TEETH, I ASKED HIM IF HE HAD ATTENDED MORGAN
PARK
HIGH SCHOOL ..
'YES. YES, I DID. I'M A MUSTANG,' HE GLEAMED WITH PRIDE.
WHEN DID YOU GRADUATE?' I ASKED.
HE ANSWERED, 'IN 1962. WHY DO YOU ASK?'
YOU WERE IN MY CLASS!', I EXCLAIMED.
HE STOPPED AND LOOKED AT ME CLOSELY.
THEN, THAT UGLY,
OLD,
BALD HEADED,
WRINKLED FACED,
FAT-ASSED,
GRAY-HAIRED,
DECREPIT
OLD SON-OF-A-BITCH
ASKED,
'WHAT SUBJECT DID YOU TEACH???
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Monday, March 5, 2012
Sunday, March 4, 2012
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Friday, March 2, 2012
the english language,,NO WONDER ITS CONFUSING
PRICELESS!!!!!
The
Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again invited readers to take any word
from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one
letter, and supply a new definition.
Here
are the winners:1.
Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
2.
Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
3.
Intaxicaton: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize
it was your money to start with.
4. Reintarnation: Coming
back to life as a hillbilly.
5. Bozone ( n.): The substance
surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone
layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose
of getting laid.
7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted
very, very high
8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of
sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
9.
Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running
late.
10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got
extra credit.)
11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is
sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth
explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
12. Decafalon
(n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that
are good for you.
13. Glibido: All talk and no action.
14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem
smarter when they come at you rapidly.
15. Arachnoleptic
Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked
through a spider web.
16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form
of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be
cast out.
17. Caterpallor ( n.): The color you turn after
finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
The
Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly
contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common
words.
And the winners are:
1.
Coffee, n. The person upon whom one coughs.
2.
Flabbergasted, adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.
3. Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat
stomach.
4. esplanade, v. To attempt an explanation while
drunk.
5. Willy-nilly, adj. Impotent.
6.
Negligent, adj. Absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a
nightgown.
7. Lymph, v. To walk with a
lisp.
8. Gargoyle, n. Olive-flavored
mouthwash.
9. Flatulence, n. Emergency vehicle that picks up
someone who has been run over by a steamroller.
10.
Balderdash, n. A rapidly receding hairline.
11.
Testicle, n. A humorous question on an exam.
12.
Rectitude, n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon, n. A Rastafarian proctologist.
14.
Oyster, n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism, n. The belief that, after death, the
soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16.
Circumvent, n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish
men.
Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again invited readers to take any word
from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one
letter, and supply a new definition.
Here
are the winners:1.
Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
2.
Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
3.
Intaxicaton: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize
it was your money to start with.
4. Reintarnation: Coming
back to life as a hillbilly.
5. Bozone ( n.): The substance
surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone
layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose
of getting laid.
7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted
very, very high
8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of
sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
9.
Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running
late.
10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got
extra credit.)
11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is
sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth
explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
12. Decafalon
(n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that
are good for you.
13. Glibido: All talk and no action.
14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem
smarter when they come at you rapidly.
15. Arachnoleptic
Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked
through a spider web.
16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form
of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be
cast out.
17. Caterpallor ( n.): The color you turn after
finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
The
Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly
contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common
words.
And the winners are:
1.
Coffee, n. The person upon whom one coughs.
2.
Flabbergasted, adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.
3. Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat
stomach.
4. esplanade, v. To attempt an explanation while
drunk.
5. Willy-nilly, adj. Impotent.
6.
Negligent, adj. Absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a
nightgown.
7. Lymph, v. To walk with a
lisp.
8. Gargoyle, n. Olive-flavored
mouthwash.
9. Flatulence, n. Emergency vehicle that picks up
someone who has been run over by a steamroller.
10.
Balderdash, n. A rapidly receding hairline.
11.
Testicle, n. A humorous question on an exam.
12.
Rectitude, n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon, n. A Rastafarian proctologist.
14.
Oyster, n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism, n. The belief that, after death, the
soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16.
Circumvent, n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish
men.
how to spell oklahoma
Subject: learning is fun
Thursday, March 1, 2012
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