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Wednesday, November 28, 2012


Retirement !!! 

Question:  How many days in a week?  
Answer:      6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday 
Question:  When is a retiree's bedtime?  
Answer:      Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.

  How many retirees to change a light bulb?  
Answer:      Only one, but it might take all day. 

  What's the biggest gripe of retirees?  
Answer:      There is not enough time to get everything done.

  Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?  
:      The term comes with a 10% discount. 

  Among retirees what is considered formal attire?  
Tied shoes. 

  Why do retirees count pennies?  
   They are the only ones who have the time.   

  What is the common term for a senior who still works and refuses to retire?  

Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage? 
Answer:  They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.  Or move back in there . . .

  What do retirees call a long lunch?  
Answer:     Normal .

What is the best way to describe retirement?  
Answer:    The never ending Coffee Break spiked ! 

Question:  What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?  
Answer:       If you cut classes, no one calls your parents. 

  Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he worked with?                                 
Answer:        He is too polite to tell the whole truth.  

And, my very favorite....
  What do you do all week?  
Answer:          Monday through Friday, NOTHING..... Saturday & Sunday, I rest. 


Now, I think you're supposed to share this with 5 or 6, maybe 10 others. Oh heck, give it to a bunch of your friends if you can remember who they are! 
Always Remember This: 
You don't stop laughing because you grow old,
You grow old because you stop laughing

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